Knitting and Knitting and Knitting

One characteristic I know, for a fact, that I lack --it's in my very genetic make-up-- is patience. Patience is not a virtue present in anyone in my family. My dad and his brothers are infamous for their short fuses and ability to get riled up over essentially nothing. Yes, it's largely due to am inability to control their temper, but it almost always surfaces when they are having to wait for something. Anything. Waiting another 5 minutes (or really any minutes) for their food at a drive-thru (FYI Whataburger, we are gonna sit here at this window and hold up the rest of the line until we get our damn Chophouse Cheddar Burger --we're not playing your pull-forward mind game). Waiting one second longer to see what is happening on the television because someone has had the audacity to pass in front of it. Every stop light is the longest in town. We are leaving at 8:00 and it's 7:55 and you're not ready and what the hell is taking so long?! We are not waiters, my family. 

I knew going in that this was the MAIN ingredient to being good at knitting, and yet... here we are. Maybe someday I'll break the vicious family cycle.

Soooo needless to say, it's off to a slow and maddening start. I was not naive enough to think I could pick this up in a day (or maybe I was?), but I may not have the je ne sais quoi to be good at this long term.
Why did I decide to try knitting?
Why does any TV nerd under the age of 55?
To make your own Jayne Cobb Hat, of course.

(Now from what I understand this is actually made by crocheting? Ugh.)

So, I blindly grabbed some smooth yarn I didn't hate (thanks, random knitter at Hobby Lobby!), some nifty acrylic needles and sat down to see if I could get down the basics. Little did I know, that I had to learn a new language in the process --cast on, purl, continental. The first video I tried to learn from failed to mention that I wanted to leave my stitches loose enough to be able to get my needle back in there for the next row. I wanted them to look neat and small so I pulled those suckers tight --like a you know who's you know what on Sunday. It also explained how to make a slip knot in such a way that I had no clue that they meant, you know, just make a slip knot. Keep it simple, stupid video. I found one that is geared to teaching pre-teens and I suddenly got on a roll...of sorts.

This is about as far as I've gotten.

There's only one dropped stitch so far so that's a win, I guess. Never you mind how long it's taken me to get this far. Turns out this is not the 'mindless' hobby I thought it would be. This demands all my attention or else I'll be droppin' stitches and shit left and right.

l am not giving up, certainly, but I think I need a decided project to work on (I'm going to have to work up to the Big Damn Hero gear) so I know when I have 'arrived'. I might just give in and go for a scarf because, yeah that's something even I can't screw up. If I manage to finish, I'll post evidence. 
Yay, learning!


*bonus points if you got the movie reference from the post title. This one was a classic in my house as a kid. Childish --I KNOW YOU ARE BUT WHAT AM I?

Previous Posts

3. Things I Need (and Should Want) to Learn

2. (Classic) Films To Watch

1. Read (more) Books

100 New Things: List-o-mania

3. Things I Need (and Should Want) to Learn

Once upon a time after a very rough patch in our relationship, I composed a list of things I wanted my dad to teach me. It was mainly a way for us to spend time with each other on his turf and on his terms. My dad likes to spend time with me (and brings the guilt when we don't) but usually only if it's while doing stuff he enjoys. He will humor me once and a while, but mostly he only feels like we are 'bonding' if it's doing something he finds fun. (Ironically, my mother and I have a deep, shared love for baseball and --due to his temper and bandwagon fandom tendencies --we do not let him attend or watch games with us as he sucks out all the fun.) Also, even though he knows it makes my insides curl up, whatever we're doing you can bet we'll have to listen to Fox Radio on the way there. Then --because I am my father's daughter --you can also bet that this will now put me in a mood from which I cannot recover and has hence tainted our day together. 
Fun family times.

Being fully an adult and with no man in my life *insert my mother's tears here*, I felt there were plenty of things that I needed to know how to do for myself. I hate feeling like I don't even really know how to hang curtains properly. Don't get me wrong, I consider myself to be mechanically inclined and I'm not one of those helpless girls who have to have a man do everything non-feminine for them --fuck that. Sometimes Pinterest doesn't know everything and you need hands on advice from an actual dude. I'm old-fashioned that way. I have since lost that original list and got him to show me exactly zero things, but this is a halfway attempt at re-creating that list. 

Things I Need (and Should Want) to Learn 

• How to change a tire
• How to jump start a car (without burning/shocking/killing myself)
• (Re)Learn (some)Spanish 
• Take up guitar lessons (again)
• Cook something (fairly complex) from scratch
• Sew something simple and from scratch
• Knit 
• Learn to take (real) pictures
• How to type in proper form (and at least 40wmp)
• And things to be added later

There is no limit to the things I do not know so this list should really be longer... We'll see how long my patience lasts in trying to tackle new things. This is not a dude-centric list like before but it seems I still need help in areas of male expertise then the rest of this is gonna be sisters doin' it for themselves, ya know?

Previous Posts

2. (Classic) Films To Watch

1. Read (more) Books

100 New Things: List-o-mania

2. (Classic) Films to Watch

In this grand attempt at doing things with my year, this is the one list I can say with certainty that I will complete. Completely.

The most complex question you could ask me isn't about religion or politics or even what the best episode of Firefly is, but rather: 'What's your favorite movie?' At the very least, I will need you to supply a genre and a decade if this is to be real discussion with honest answers.

Movies, movies, movies, movies, movies, movies. I love movies. LOVE. I worked at a major and now mostly defunct movie rental chain for five years and if it paid more than minimum wage (and didn't require that I wear khakis), I would most likely still be there. My interview consisted of a singular question: Name all of Quentin Tarantino's movies. HIRED! In my first year of working there, it was routine for me to get off at midnight and still make time to watch 3 movies a night before bed.
Tip: I do not recommend watching Korean horror before bedtime and when the rest of the house is asleep. You learn that lesson real quick. 

Engaged in constant movie discussion with co-workers and customers, unlimited access to hundreds of titles, and the ability to influence the 'every man' in to trying something amazing that they'd never give a second look --truly the Lord's work. People shouldn't be able to get paid for that. Most importantly, you also aren't afraid of trying craptastic things that look like they did not pass go, did not gross $200 and went straight to DVD. Every once in a while, taking that leap can lead to uncovering happy-making little gems that you kick yourself for almost not watching. (See: The Salton Sea, I'm Not Scared, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Love Song for Bobby Long, Running Scared and tons more that escape me).

It kind of amazes even me to see some of the titles on this list. 

• Citizen Kane 
• The Bicycle Thief
• The Grapes of Wrath
• Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
• Letter From an Unknown Woman
• Double Indemnity 
• Dr. Strangelove
• The Sound of Music 
• The French Connection
• Annie Hall
• Taxi Driver
• The Godfather (all 3)

I went 100% old school here. Some I chose because they are on AFI's 100 Years 100 Movies List or some such and others are ones I stumbled across to uncover 'the best movies you've never seen.' The Sound of Music is for LA because I love her --the mere thought of "The hiiiiiills are aliiiive..." makes me want to jump in a deep, deep lava-filled hole. She swears that's as cheesy as it gets and that the movie holds up and is soooo much better than that one scene and Christopher Plummer is soooo hot. We'll see, LA.

Surely, consuming this list will do more to enlighten me in the ways of the world and give me priceless advice that I have not yet had the life experiences to learn firsthand... or, you know, strengthen my pop culture gaming skills. Besides, Future Husband will need to share my opinions for obvious vital reasons.

Pass the popcorn!



Previous Posts
1. Read (more) Books
100 New Things: List-o-mania

1. Read (more) Books

I love having read. I love the feeling of finishing a journey that took place entirely from the comfort of my couch (see: laziness). The last page turned: a feeling of accomplishment and completion --little effort and usually great reward. I, however, do not always enjoy the act of reading. When I was in 9th grade, it took me literally two years and several re-starts to read a single book --and it was one I wanted to read. (It was Victoria Holt's The Road to Paradise Island. Spoiler: It wasn't worth it.) 

At 27 years old, J.K. Rowling, reminded me that reading can not only be enjoyable but also incredibly meaningful. Every now and then with the right book, you stumble upon something that influences large parts of your life and can change the way you look at...everything. Every book is different for every person. Each of us pulls from different experiences, backgrounds, and beliefs then interprets the words in ways that are meaningful (or not) to us. I read Half-Blood Prince only a few months after my grandfather died so you can just guess how hard I cried on page 596.

The power of paper, you guys. Of course, not all books do this. Most don't. And sometimes, I let that discourage me. I have attempted many a book on a trusted friend's recommendation, randomly plucked a cute cover off a clearance shelf, and borrowed the occasional best seller from the public library only to be sorely disappointed that it just wasn't for me. It's kind of like I'm Julia Roberts in Runaway Bride and I have no idea how I like my eggs. How can I be thirty and have no idea what kind of books I like? I loved HP but am well aware that typical fantasy fare is not my jam. I have a feeling that genres are not going to be my thing and this is a scour-the-world-one-book-at-a-time type search. Goodie. *eye roll* (I'm even lazy when it comes to discovering my recreational preferences.)

I want to stop being that girl that when asked if she's read a good book lately suggests a book she read in the 9th grade that wasn't really that good so she doesn't seem like a dope who doesn't really read. These books I've selected are some most literary authorities consider to be 'great' or 'classic' so it seems like as good a place as any to start. I tried to include one from each of the quintessential authors that I have not yet attempted and I think I might actually enjoy. (Anything by Hemingway or Dickens is just a no-go.) I am starting with these six which I feel is most definitely an ambitious number to tackle in a 12 month span:

• Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
• 1984 by George Orwell
• Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
• Beloved by Toni Morrison
• The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
• Sons and Lovers by D.H. Lawrence

Will I force myself to read all of these books for the sake of finishing my list? Most certainly not. Life is too short to read something you don't enjoy. Reading Twilight three times because you think you just aren't getting it? Put it down. It's not your thing. (Or it's just bad.) 
There are zillions of books out there and once you find one that 'fits'? 
There's nothing that can compare.
Here goes.

Previous Posts

100 New Things: List-o-mania

100 New Things: List-O-Mania

Sometimes (or in my case, always) The New Year rolls around and you think, 'Damn. What did I even do this year? Did I accomplish anything? Did anything change? I am going to be this boring and this lonely forever.' 
As you get older, that statement gets louder and angrier as you say it to yourself.

This past September I turned thirty.
THREE. ZERO. 
This is unfathomable.
That's... old.
Old people are thirty.
People with kids and mortgages are thirty. 
Thirty is halfway to sixty which is only twenty years removed from most certainly being DEAD.

And if you think on those phrases for too long, it can very quickly become a source of depression. I have no marriage prospects (or even vaguely respectable candidates), no kids (or plans to have kids) and am nowhere near the financial means to be able to afford my own home in the next few years. Society tells me I should value and strive for those things, and while I mostly disagree, it can consequently put things into an unsettling 'my life is half over' perspective.

However, it can also be a sign to yourself that you haven't caved --a fighting (and inadvertent) bucker of societal norms. I don't feel 30. Most days I feel like I'm only getting started. High school buddies on Facebook posting pictures of their now fourth kid. How is that even physically possible that you've had FOUR children since I saw you ten years ago. I feel like I only left high school. I see college kids and people barely old enough to buy a Bud Light and think, 'They're my age. We're peers!'
No. No, you're not.
You're not a 'kid' anymore, Michelle.
Get a tighter grip on reality, please. For everyone's sake.

While I do not always feel my age, I do feel that some things are getting by me. Opportunities are getting missed. Knowledge is escaping. I am wasting precious, precious time. And wasting it doing what? Catching up on Downton Abbey and scouring tumblr for unseen pictures of the adorable Ian Kinsler.
Naturally.

(He is too adorable for a grown-ass man)

My hope is that this isn't going to be yet another tired blog about someone crossing things off their Bucket List (I don't have one) or even about changing who I am (well, maybe a little). It's going to mostly be about conquering laziness. It's about avoiding regrets in not having said, tried or done something. Not worrying about doing something wrong but a worry of not doing it at all. About learning to enjoy the attempt regardless of the result and being happy with who I am now --not waiting to see if I like myself more when this list is done.

In smaller terms, this endeavor is going to be about following through --finishing what I start. I want to write more. I want to do more. Learn more. Live more. Not only do I want to experience more for myself, but to maybe even find more of myself. I guess everyone has their own Eat, Pray, Love period. Mine will happen on a smaller budget and most likely within the state lines of Texas so the only people in Hollywood likely to knock on my door for this story will work for Lifetime (and likely only if I die or contract Cancer along the way).

90% of this blog and its postings are for my own personal records. I'm hoping a blog will keep me honest, keep me accountable and, most of all, keep me motivated. If I get brave, maybe even a video or two! If people read it and enjoy it? Awesome. If not, I will have an archive of the year I decided to set goals and achieve them or die trying. No matter what happens, I will be happy in the attempt. Or that's what I'm telling myself for now.

And with that, my 100 New Things in 2013:

• Read (more) Books  
• (Classic) Films to Watch  
• Things to Learn (Spanish, for starters)
• Try (at least) 10 New Foods (that aren't alcoholic)
• Projects to Start/Finish (crafty or otherwise) 
• Places to Visit/See (local and non-local) 
• Changes to Make (Mind, Mostly Body, and Soul)
• Things to Do ('do' being the operative word) 

The list as I have it now is around 70 things total. I'll post the lists in detail one by one as I attempt to start, no doubt, with the easiest ones to achieve being posted first (lazy isn't conquered overnight). I'm leaving a bit of room to grow and modify it as I try new things (and subsequently not like them, I'm sure). Here's to hoping that I can find it in myself to do all these and more.

Cheers to 2013, ya'll.